Tardiness will not be tolerated

So I stole this from a friend:

EVICTION NOTICE

TO:   Baby "Ragnar" Thompson

 (Tenant Name)

   Middle of Sara Thompsons, Womb #1

 (Street)

   Farmington, UT 84025

 (City, State, Zip Code)

Pursuant to the provisions of WTF 540:2, you are hereby given an eviction notice and notice to vacate, on or before   immediately , 2012, the premises and uterus owned by  Sara Thompson  of the City of  Farmington , in the County of  Davis , Utah, which premises are now occupied by you.

The reason for this eviction notice is:

/    x /  Your failure to birth upon the given due date, pursuant to WTF 540:2 II (a).  A demand to birth was served upon you on    June 20th, 2012  and you have refused and neglected to birth on the aforementioned due date.

You are hereby notified that you have no right to avoid this eviction, you are no longer welcome in the uterus of Sara Thompson and your presence in your newly decorated nursery is demanded, immediately. 

Dated:  June 20 , 2012   

             Sara Thompson   

               (Womblord/Mother Name)

                123 N. 456 W.  

               (Street)

                Farmington, UT 84025  

               (City, State, Zip Code)

                Sara Thompson 

               (Signature)

 I hereby certify that on the  25^h day of  June, 2012, at 1:00  am/pm I gave in hand to/left at the abode of  Baby Thompson , above named, a true copy of the above original notice.

                Adam Thompson  

               (Signature)