There are some things I will never forget.

Like the time six months before 9/11 I asked my mom could the middle east ever attack us, and she said no. Her words were along the lines of "no, they couldn't they don't have weapons to reach that far". Almost exactly six months later 9/11 happened. That was the day I learned my parents weren't always right and my Mommy couldn't always protect me. Those words and her promise have haunted me since. Whenever someone says " don't worry about it", "it wont happen" ect ect... I snap and say " you never know!" Adam does this a lot and a lot of the times I find my self saying "never say never" or  knocking on wood while comforting my self with a silent prayer and the memory of that day.

The reason I asked my mom this was, I remember the day I asked her that question and I remember why. The radio z100 had said something about Sadamm Hussein planning to attack the US within six months. I remember this because six months was my birthday. I remember where I was when I asked my mom, what stop light we were at. Sometimes I wonder if I am imagining that question, if none of that event of her telling me those things happened, because I never heard anything about that rumor after 9/11.  Maybe it was an imagination, maybe I never asked it. But for the last ten years I have been telling my mom that, and remembering that day I asked like it was today. I remember trusting her, and believing she was always right and then feeling lied to and more scared then I have ever been. There is so much I remember, like the man I knocked into a week earlier at the WTC. I remember his face and everything. We were both in a hurry. I remember thinking right after 9/11 he probably isn't alive anymore.  I remember the skirt I put in the back rack of the JCrew at the WTC to get it at a later day ( you know so no one would take it lol). I remember telling my mom that the stair cases looked like they belonged in a Frank Sinatra movie,and the Palm Trees now they want to tear them down. And with them the last thing I had of the WTC.

There is so much I remember, and so much I haven't ever said publicly in ten years. Most of all I always remember the guilt I felt. How I didn't deserve to be this upset because I didn't loose anyone, I had no reason to be sad. But I lost my innocence that day. I lost that faith you have in your parents in less than one minute. This wasn't a Santa Clause situation when you learn hes not real. This was human lives destroyed being displayed everywhere. There is more I remember but this is enough for today. More then I have shared in 10 years.

May your strength give us strength,

May your faith give us faith,

May your hope give us hope,

May your love bring us love